Why Women Carry 73% of Cognitive Labor—And How to Fix It

In an article published yesterday in the Washington Post, psychologist, researcher, and mother, Jelena Kecmanovic - Dr K., discusses cognitive labor—a topic that comes up all the time in my coaching partnerships with scientist mothers in heterosexual relationships.

“I was overwhelmed and felt I was neither excelling at my work nor being fully present with my family.” Sound familiar?

The article discusses a recent study (Aviv et al., 2024) of 322 mothers of young children that found the division of cognitive labor was more unevenly shared than even “physical” household work. Women reported being responsible for 73 percent of the cognitive labor, leading them to feel stressed, depressed, burned out, and dissatisfied with their relationship. The article also cites other recent studies finding similar negative effects, with additional influence on women’s job performance and careers.

The following strategies are offered:

1.     Increasing awareness. Start by tracking the invisible cognitive labor required to keep the household running, from adding toilet paper to the shopping list to meal planning to scheduling appointments to managing kids' activities (etc., etc., etc.).

2.     Communication and redistribution. Open, respectful communication is key. Set aside time to discuss and rebalance responsibilities, and approach these conversations with a non-defensive mindset. Regular check-ins help adjust to shifting demands.

For a deeper dive, I highly recommend Eve Rodsky's Fair Play system, a card-game-based method to divide tasks fairly, ensuring accountability from conception to completion.

I also love Zach Watson #recoveringmanchild for approachable content on cognitive/emotional labor created for men. https://lnkd.in/eGu6MeSv insta: @zachmentalloadcoach

As the article states, “we need to be very deliberate and explicit about the division of labor — otherwise, the old patterns will prevail.”

#cognitivelabor #genderequity #womeninmedicine #womeninSTEM #womeninscience #leadership #emotionallabor #invisiblelabor